She Keeps Calling it a 'DS'
by Ame Penn
Summary: Based on the most popular GameFAQs 3DS Board topic, angry at his sister's constant sexyness, a young man embarks on an epic journey to get into her pants. That's... that's pretty much it.


**She Keeps Calling it a DS**

**Chapter 0**

"She keeps calling it a 'DS'," thought Berny as he lay face-up, squeezed tightly between the carpet and the wooden support beams of a bed. "Technically she's right since it is the 3DS, but still..." He slowly inched past dust bunnies and lost socks to make his way out from under her bed -no, wait, what's he doing? He's _taking_ her socks and putting them in his pocket. Really? Ugh.

Anyway, as he quietly skooches outward so as not to wake his sister, he continues with his train of thought, "...still, the 3DS is way too new and calling it a DS right now is too confusing. It's like calling an Xbox 360 just 'Xbox' when the 360 just launched and people still own a real normal Xbox." Berny manages to stand up after being trapped under her bed for several hours. She had the nerve to casually stroll into her room like she owned the place while Berny was very busy looking through her things. How inconsiderate of her.

Standing in pitch darkness next to his sleeping sister's bed, with nary a witness, he contemplates what every guy on GameFAQs would tell him.

"Aggressively make out with her!"

"Tap it! Tap it like the Rockies!"

"Wait, she's your sister? ...HIT IT!"

"The boobies! For goodness' sake, will no one think of the boobies?"

Oh, the StreetPass light is blinking!

**Chapter 1**

It's just another day of waking up and needing to pee to get rid of his morning wood, then finding his sumptuous sister in a bath towel brushing her teeth. Oh, how he longs to be that Oral-B CrossAction Vitalizer Plus toothbrush she's having her way with. "Oral-Berny," he'd be called. And just with that short fantasy, taking a leak will no longer help enough.

"Dear brother of mine, I didn't see you there as I was thrusting this toothbrush in and out of my mouth vigorously, and white foam ran down the side of my mouth. I am naked and wet under this flimsy towel, but I'm almost done."

Since we're inside the most perverse of minds, fellow readers, we can't be sure if that's exactly what she said. When she walked past him, though, she definitely smelled sweet like cucumber-melon Herbal Essence. Or cucumber-melon Garnier Fructis. Or cucumber-melon Bath & Body Works. "I'll just check the shower stall to be sure which one," he convinced himself.

And there they were... wet panties. Aqua blue and sheer at the top. If Berny wore glasses, they'd be completely fogged up right now. If Berny were an anime character, his face would turn red and his nose would bleed. If Berny were a pervert, he'd pick them up and wear them on his head.

He picked them up and wore them on his head.

Angry at this sister's constant sexyness, he shut the door, pumped his fists into the air, and proclaimed in the manliest voice he could achieve: "Damn it, sis, you'll pay for this! I will have you! By midnight tomorrow, I WILL MAKE WINCEST TO YOU!"

Everyone in the 3DS board on GameFAQs rejoiced.

Berny was now the first member of his new revolution. A movement for all guys with overly hot sisters to sleep with them at least once in their lifetime. There was a new gleam in his eyes, and for the first time ever, a purpose for his existence. Berny was going to do the forbidden dance. Or at least sex since he's terrible at salsa dancing. It's just as well because the song in his head when it recalled "the forbidden dance" was actually La Bamba. As you can see, Latin dance songs was not his forté. He's actually all about the Harlem Shake, earning him the nickname "The White Surprise" among the hardest of local street dancers.

Whoa, totally derailed there! Berny has now embarked on an epic journey of Odyssean proportions (short-story constraints permitting) to get in her sister's pants. And by "get in her sister's pants" I don't mean actually attempt to fit into her pants. _Emos, get out_. This story is for pervs, which hold a slightly higher social standing than yours.

_In the next chapter, we'll follow Berny as he develops and tries out ingenious schemes to woo his sister. Adventure awaits!_


End file.
